Transformers 3D - Dark of the Moon (2011)

I promised myself I wouldn't go see this. I knew I wouldn't like it or worse, be bored by it. I remember the first one was one of the most ugly films made for older children I'd seen with just vile dirty jokes. Now obviously, i'm a fan of dirty jokes but not in film's like this, ones made for children specifically and on top of that, it didn't make much sense either.
Then came the second film, and in my charitablity/stupidity-i hoped for a better film with the creases of the 1st film smoothed out and yet somehow they managed to all be magnified!! Transformers 2 should be investigated by the narcotic substances authorities because it manages to be violent, overblown, narcissistic, sexually and racially insensitive and all the while being thoroughly anti-senseicall, overlong and boring. And I don't have room on the my docket to be pissed with Michael Bay about it because he still hasn't apologised for Pearl Harbour yet. First things first.
But I dragged myself to see it because it promised Frances Mcdormand and like any Coen Brothers fan would be, I was understandably curious.
Well the somewhat good news, written on a bunch of clutched straws is that this Transformers movie (hopefully the last) managed to fix almost every issue (minus the film's length- a bum-numbing, multiple-phone-and-watch-checking 3hrs!). Now let me be blunt, i am in no way suggesting you give this film a second thought let alone pay to see it + plus popcorn and various 3D taxes but in the way that some crimes are less severe then others - this film is parking ticket compared to no. 2's genocidal war crimes status.
I'll give a spurious slow sarcastic golf-clap to Bay for making a film that generally makes broad common sense or at least a feeling of knowing what was going on for an audience and the skydiving stuff was exciting and... John Malkovich was pretty funny as was John Tuturro but these are basic requirements that a film like this should have not celebrations of relative success.
But you know what... I think that Michael Bay despite making some of the worst films i've seen in a cinema, i think he's capable to make something really exciting and amazing, if he could have it written and edited right like say, Bad Boys 2. It's bizarre and frustrating that his talent is apparent by the scale of his failures. Same goes for Shia LaBeouf - i like the guy but he's doing himself no favors doing sequels and franchise movies. They both must be rich enough to have creative freedom and crazy and kooky projects cos we want original material not repeats, man!

I watched Transformers 3D - Dark of the Moon (2011) at the cinema.
My 2011 in Movies will return with Season Of The Witch (2011)...